Thursday, August 30, 2012

May I Introduce My....SON!

Meet the Monkey, as he appears, everyday(if you can get him to sit still long enough to take a picture).

He can usually be found playing Lego, throwing water balloons, playing with his self-made bow and arrow, watching action movies, playing shoot em up video games, and wandering the neighbourhood with his sling shot in his very grubby hand.

 This is the Monkey, showing off his earring.
 He asked to have his ear pierced for his seventh birthday. I could see no valid reason to say no, and applauded his request for a "significant event" as a gift instead of a mass produced piece of plastic. He is very proud of his earring, and shows it off often.

Gasp! Is that...Nail Polish?!? On a BOY?!? 

The Monkey LOVES getting his nails painted. He goes through my polish collection, selecting just the right shade, often requesting elaborate designs. I'm happy to oblige, within the spectrum of my very limited artistic abilities. He wears the polish proudly. 

Warning...This is where the rant begins.

Why do others insist on making this a negative? Is he harming them? Is he harming ANY other living creature OR inanimate object? Is he harming himself? The answer is a resounding....NO!

He is simply choosing to express himself and his particular brand of individuality in a way that goes against the gender stereotyped social norms. I thought we were past this as a society. My bad, apparently we're not.

As we were going through the cash in the grocery store the other day, the cashier went out of her way to stop him and ask him if he "was a girl?". Fortunately, he is completely comfortable with is choices, and totally oblivious to the negativity with which this question was asked. he simply said "No, I'm a boy." then proceeded to describe how his nails were turquoise with gold crackle polish over top.

I however wished that I was of the quick witted variety so that I could have discreetly put her in her place.

I really can't believe that we are still dealing with strangers feeling that they have the right to make judgemental comments towards our children. I know that my mother dealt with the same types of comments twenty years ago when my short-haired, but clad head to foot in pink and purple sister was regularly "teased" by strangers about looking like a boy. Even worse is that the parents of these children would be considered RUDE if we called these total strangers on their rudeness. Imagine if I had responded by asking if she was a man, since she had whiskers on her chin? How is it different?

Next point...
The Monkey notices when I change my hair colour
The Monkey LOVES to cook
The Monkey is quick to hug, and comfort those in pain(physical or emotional)
The Monkey LOVES to talk, and laugh
The Monkey enjoys shopping
The Monkey expresses his emotions

These are all facets of him. Parts of him that society considers to be facets of his "feminine side". Parts that as a young boy, society is very quick to point out, make him girly. The nail polish and earring are also parts of his more sensitive(read, feminine) personality. Interesting that as a grown man, these are ALL traits that will be used to sell him as a good husband, a good partner, a male that is a positive contributor to society.


  1. The Monkey sounds like he's off to a great start. :) I love the innocence of kids, though b/c we know better it sucks for us.

    1. Thanks, It's a pretty frustrating experience when it happens. I need to be better at breaking my own socialized politeness to defend my children.

  2. I wonder about our society often :/ have you seen the article about the faster who wore a skirt to make his little boy feel more comfortable? I shared it on FB... So sweet. As for the monkey; he sounds like a caring, attentive and unique young man. All awesome things in my book! Good job mama!

    1. Thanks Steph, I have seen that article and it tugs at my heart. The Monkey is exactly who he is supposed to be, and no one has the right to say otherwise :)

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